The 5 Stages of a Dying Marriage (And How One Weekend Could Bring Yours Back to Life)
- Dr. Alduan Tartt
- Jun 12
- 2 min read
Updated: Jul 2
You never thought you’d end up here.
You still love your spouse. You still pray for your marriage. But lately, something’s shifted—and not in a good way. The laughter is rare. The connection feels off. The silence? It’s deafening.
Most marriages don’t break in one blow. They quietly unravel across five stages. And if you’re in any of them, now is the time to act.
Let me walk you through them—and show you how to stop the slide before it becomes a freefall.
1. Disillusionment – “This isn’t what I signed up for.”
It starts with disappointment. You’re doing life together, but not living together. The spark dims, and frustration creeps in.
"I remember sitting next to him at dinner, thinking, 'How did we become strangers?'"
This is the first warning sign—and also your best chance to change direction.
2. Erosion – “We argue about everything—or nothing at all.”
The little things start adding up. Resentments stay unresolved. Conversations feel like landmines—or they don’t happen at all.
"I started keeping score. He forgot my birthday. I didn’t tell him I got promoted. We both punished each other in quiet, petty ways."
The damage is subtle, but real. And it grows if left unchecked.
3. Detachment – “I stopped trying.”
You stop bringing things up… not because everything’s fine, but because you’ve started to give up.
"He came home late, and I didn’t even ask where he’d been. I just turned over and went to sleep."
This isn’t peace—it’s emotional numbness. And it’s dangerous.
4. The Straw – “Everything feels like too much.”
One more disagreement. One more forgotten need. One more moment where you feel invisible—and it all starts to feel like the final straw.
"We were walking on eggshells. The kids could feel it. Even loading the dishwasher turned into a fight."
When the weight of everything becomes too heavy, the relationship starts to crack under pressure.
5. Emotional Death – “I love them… but I don’t feel it anymore.”
This is where couples start talking in past tense.“We used to be close.”“He used to make me laugh.”
"I told my friend, 'We’re still married, but it feels over.' I didn’t want a divorce—but I didn’t want this either."
This is the final stage. But it doesn’t have to be the end of your story.
There’s Still Time to Choose Each Other Again
We created A Weekend For Love for couples just like you—couples who feel distant, but not done.I’ve watched men cry during prayer. I’ve seen wives smile again after years of silence.I’ve witnessed God breathe life back into what felt broken.
You don’t need more time. You need space. You need tools. You need hope.
Join us July 18–21, 2025 at Barnsley Gardens, GA.This luxury, faith-based retreat is private, peaceful, and built for true reconnection—without the pressure to share your story with strangers.
It’s just you, your spouse, the right guidance, and the time to finally focus on what matters most.
Don’t wait until it’s too late. Let this be your turning point.

Resource: 5 Stages of A Dying Marriage
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